I'm in a funk. I'm in a bummed out mood most of the time. I spend my evenings laying on the couch playing candy crush. Which is also where I fall asleep and then move to my bed around 2am. My house is a disaster. I pulled all my Christmas decorations out on Sunday and never touched them after that. They're currently sitting in the middle of my dinning room and I just keep walking around them. And I haven't been to the gym on a regular basis in weeks.
I think it's the end of the semester burn out and I'm not even a student! These last 13ish weeks have been run, run, run for me and I just don't want to do anything. Except sleep.
For the last few years I've just thrown myself into work and student activities here on campus. I have had something different going on every night between a meeting or an event. And while that has been great for me, I think that season of my life is coming to a close. I knew it wouldn't last forever and it has been really fun.
And while I love having plans and doing things with friends, I'm also longing for time at home. But I don't want to be home alone. So many of my friends now have families of their own and I'm over here hanging out with my cat. (She is a good tv watching partner when she is in the mood to snuggle.) I'm ready for a new routine. I don't want my evenings to be so scheduled. I want to know that I can go home and still have something to do. Going on a random walk or bike ride around town without having to plan it would be awesome. Which I do, I just want someone to do it with. Someone I know will always be there.
And this is not to say I have not enjoyed these single years because I have enjoyed them so much! I have learned and grown more than I ever thought possible in the past three years. I am just ready for the next chapter of my life and getting really down about it not being my time yet. And that's dumb of me to do. I know that God will bring me the perfect man in his perfect time. And all this mopping I'm doing right now is just wasting time that I could be doing something really meaningful and awesome. A few weeks ago at bible study a classmate shared something that her pastor told her that being worried about the future is temporary atheism. Which is true. I know it will all work out. I just need to be patient.
But here I am. Sounding whiny and pathetic, which I am not.
And I've already signed up for zumba tonight, so I'll get some good cardio in tonight.
And to further add to why I'm probably single, here is a cute picture of my cat.
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